Regardless of whether it is your first time or not, you are no doubt trying to find advice on performing anal sex so that it can bring pleasure to each other.

One of the first things to do if you are a man is to find out whether your lover would like to try anal sex. Whatever you do, never assume it will be okay to surprise her by just putting your penis in her butt. She really won't thank you for it. Talk to her about it. But be prepared, there are some women will find just the thought of anal sex a real turn off. But the secret of any fulfilling sexual relationship is communication.

Explore her anus gently to begin with. Don't make her anus the focus of your attention at first. Just caress it gently with a finger while kissing and stroking her with your other hand. If you go straight to her anus and stay there, it will make her tense - and that is not what you want. Integrate a little anal play into your other sex techniques. Couple it with something you already know she enjoys - i.e. use your tongue on her clitoris while caressing gently around her anus. After a while, slip the finger gently inside her anus - only a little way in, while you continue pleasuring her in other ways.

If she hasn't decided to stop you yet then this is a good sign that she could be willing to goall the way and allow you to have full anal sex with her. But again - go slow. Take it easy and slow down. You might even remove your finger at this point and spend some time on another part of her body before eventually going back to the anus when she is very aroused.

You might want to wait a few times before you get to have anal sex with her. But remember - no matter what she says is law when it comes to her own body. Her anus will take a lot of training to prepare it for that large intrusion - your penis. If she tells you to stop - then stop. Or you can kiss your anal adventures goodbye.

Once your partner is ready for full-on anal sex, then bear these things in mind.

1. Use lubricant and a lot of it. The walls of her anus are very thin and prone to tearing. Without lubricant then will probably cause a tear in her anal wall. It will also make it much more pleasurable for both of you.

2. Without wanting to insult your intelligence - there are a lot of bacteria inside her anus (no matter how clean she is). If you take your penis from her anus and put it into her vagina then she will be prone to an infection.

3. It's a very good idea to wear a condom during anal sex. As I mentioned, the anus is tight and friction will be much worse than in the vagina so you will need to purchase a strong, plain condom.

Anal sex can be wonderfully enjoyable for both lovers. Go slowly, be responsible and above all else - listen to her. Let her be your guide, respect her wishes and it won't be long until anal sex is a regular part of your sex life.