Bondage

In the context of BDSM, bondage involves people being tied up or otherwise restrained for pleasure. Bondage is usually, but not always, a sexual practice. The paraphilia of being sexually aroused by bondage is sometimes known as vincilagnia.

The fact that mainstream ‘high street' adult shops find it worthwhile to also stock some bondage equipment suggests that some otherwise ‘vanilla' couples incorporate elements of bondage into their sex lives at some point in their relationships. Leaving aside those couples who are themselves part of the BDSM ‘community', the use of bondage within couples tends to be very different from and separate from that normally associated with BDSM. Couples' private bondage games largely take place behind closed doors, and constitute foreplay, usually as a prelude to the couple having sex. There may or may not be some elements of dominance and submission involved as part of role play, but sadism and/or masochism rarely play any part unless the couple already has such leanings. This contrasts with activity in the BDSM subculture, where the emphasis is often more on bondage for its own sake, frequently ending in masturbation only, or indeed involving no sexual contact at all. These differences can lead to misunderstanding if couples who have tried private bondage games encounter the BDSM subculture. Trusting couples can't understand the need for safe-words, while the members of the subculture can't understand why couples mainly see bondage as a part of sexual intercourse.